Little Queenie

She was playing in her pack n play when we noticed  

she had all three of her pacifiers. 

Garth

Let me just start by saying, my honey is very stubborn.  He is a "get outside and do something" kind of guy, no matter what the weather or the situation.

And with the weather we have had lately, like the rest of the country, he has been cooped up in the house and has cabin fever.  For those of you who live in places that get a lot of snow, I feel your pain.  Or maybe it's not painful for you because you know how to get outside with the snow.  At any rate, here in this part of Texas, we don't.  Where we live when it rains or in this case snows our ground becomes very muddy.  The roads in the pastures become very slippery and when we drive down them they rut up really bad.  So, in a rancher point of view, or in my rancher's point of view, you stay off the roads as much as possible because you ruin them. 

 

Okay, so have I set the stage for you?  He's stuck in the house and has nothing to do and is blue.  Then he get a phone call from his best friend and invites us to go to Vegas this weekend.  I had already made plans to watch this little sweetheart. 

Oh, how I wanted to.  My motherly arms are just aching to get ahold of her.  She only lives five hours away from me but somehow with RS's illness that just seems to far to go these days.  I just want to spend time with her.  Look at her and watch how she reacts to things.  Find out who she is and how she sees life.  I just want to gaze into her eyes and watch her as she looks back at me.  And I so want her to get to know me and remember me.  

But he was so blue and so bored and thought he just needed to go that I felt sorry for him and called my daughter to ask for another chance at keeping little Anah Grace.  Hopefully I will get that opportunity soon.

Anyway, we made the trip and stayed at the Wynn.  When I got there I found out that Garth Brooks was playing.  Now I like my music and I like different types of music but I am not much on crowds and I am not into really big venues and reallllly loud music so I didn't think too much about it.  Until ....... I talked to one of the guys that works there.

  

This concert was like nothing I have ever seen before.  It was just him and his guitar and a small venue of me and 1200 other folks.  (side note, I got tickets because of cancellations)

  

It was so stinking good, I am writing today to tell you to go.  If you get the chance it's worth it.  He was funny and he told stories and Trisha came out and sang two songs (they say she doesn't always).  She is my favorite female singer, I have more of her albums than anyone else.  And he looked like he really enjoyed it. 

The honey doesn't know much about music, he says he was always working and never listened to the radio and I believe him because he really doesn't know much about music.

  

For those of you who do not know, we are walking our way through non-hogkins lymphoma.  We have had four chemo treatments and my honey is a type 2 diabetic and the chemo is very hard on his blood sugar.  It makes it go out of control very bad.  (did that seem like I was yelling?  Cause I was.)  My honey says he feels like he has had the flu every day since early December.  He can't sleep at night, the high blood sugar makes him have to go to the bathroom all night long.  We are trying to get it under control but it has been a battle.

  

The trip was hard on him but like the statement I opened with, my honey is stubborn.  I think all in all, he will say it was worth it but as the wife and mother hen that I am, I'm not so sure.  But such is life you just have to roll with it.  So there you go.   

  

 

Anyone Longing for Summer?

This week from the newly clean and semi-organized Craft Room

I have been elbow deep in glue and glitter this week and it has been heavenly.  I was inspired by some of the crafts that included burlap.  After all, I'm a burlap kind of girl too.  So, I started playing and ...... 

these are the results.  When the kids received them, they actually liked them.  I was stoked.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Strong Heart for the boys

Bubbly Heart

Sparkle Heart

Bold Heart

baby's heart

Old Heart

Keepin it Real - Craft Room

Honestly, I didn't want to talk about it but I knew I had to do something and I thought I would have gotten around to it by now.  But this is what my craft room looks like, again.  

and has since November.

I made a promise to myself that I would post "Keeping it Real" post from time to time. 

So, there it is.  I have not created a single thing.  Not one. single. thing.   I tried closing the door when company came over but everyone wants to see the craft room so they came on in anyway.   And, my honey, he is so proud of me that he showed it off to a man I didn't even know!  And even at that, my embarrassment was not enough to spur me on.  I couldn't seem to get off high center, maybe that's low center.

What do you do when things get to pushing against you? You Push back.  Push through it, push in spite of it, push until you see progress and then you push until you find joy in getting the job done.

   

So, this post is something I really did not want to show you.  I did not want to admit that I am  in this state again.  And frankly, I did't feel like getting it to the beautiful state it was in when I pushed in here the last time.

  

When I was a young mother and wife, I didn't do the housework like I should and my house became so cluttered that I didn't think I would ever get it cleaned.  All the while, my nose was stuck in Better Homes and Garden magazines, dreaming about a home that looked like the ones pictured there.   The clutter took over our house.  Dirty dishes were stacked in the sink and on the counter and every newspaper, milk carton, picante sauce and pickle jar we had ever used was stacked in any place there was a surface to stack something on.  Because......we might need it someday.  

One night, I was in the laundry room moving piles around, when I noticed the stack of milk cartons were starting to curve over.  They looked like they were going to topple on top of me.  I had piles everywhere.  Piles of clean clothes on the couch and piles of dirty clothes on the floor. 

  

One day I decided to do something about it.  To decide is to make up one's mind as to what shall be done and to come up with a plan to make it happen.

And that, my dear friends, is when the earth starts to move because when a women has decided in the truest sense of the word, things are about to change. 

 

The battle was my mind.  It comes down to one thing, how bad do you want it?  

When I have dieted successfully (in the past) whatever had been a temptation for me no longer was because my desire to lose the weight was greater than my desire to eat, so it was easy.  My desire to lose weight was greater than my desire to eat the things I shouldn't, so I lost the weight and kept it off.  

My mind had changed, fundamentally, deep down, DNA rearranging, bone changed.  I decided, I was resolved in my determination, I settled upon a purpose and made up my mind. 

 

My plan was simple, throw it all away.  I laid awake that night forming every step in my mind.  I knew that when I got up the next morning exactly what I was going to do.  Feed the kids breakfast, put them in the car, drive the 15 miles to town, go to the grocery store and find the biggest box of black trash bags I could find, come home, back the car up to the back door, leave trunk open and clean house! 

 

I started with all the piles and stacks in the house.  As I filled each bag up I would toss it out the back door into the open trunk of the car.  The kids bedroom looked like they had a carpet of miniature plastic Lego pieces.  I scooped all those little pieces of plastic into the black trash bag.  I knew what toys they played with and everything else was just in the way, so I threw it all away.  I know I should have donated it or put it up, recycled it and things like that.  But this was an emergency and sometimes you don't have the gumption to do anything but get it done.  The project was too big to give any energy to sorting and storing and dividing.  No, this was a time for action.  Besides, if my kids didn't like playing with that stuff no one else was going to want it either. 

 

I learned through this process that I spent more time avoiding the work than it took to do the work.  I learned to time myself.  It only takes about twenty minutes to wash, dry and put up the dishes.  Same for laundry.  Just minutes.  

So this week I turned around and I looked at the sad state I let this room get into.  

Then - I decided - made my mind up - to push back.  

My motivation was low and the weight of it made my energy level feel low.  I needed some baby steps.  I picked up a trash bag, white this time, and walked around the room and threw away what I knew was trash and that was all I did the first day.  The second day, I still didn't want to do it, but I decided to clean off the corner my computer is in - then I moved to one of the tables and then to the next.  By the time the day was over I had cleaned the whole room! 

It was done!  I was free again! 

Free to think and free to create.

These babies are for the babies.  My sweet little valentines.

 I hate clutter, I can't think when it is around.  God is not a God of chaos, He is a God or order.  There is nothing random about His creation.  Everything was done with a purpose and since we are His creation, we need order and purpose in our lives too. 

  

So if you are faced with what looks like a mountain, remember take a baby step and then another.  Time yourself.  You'll be surprised how little time it really takes to get the job done.  I promise you, you are spending more time avoiding it than it will take to do it.  And then blessing on top of blessing, there really is joy in the mundane, the ordinary simple things of life.  

Sometimes you just have to push back.

Never did like drama, just keep calm and carry on. 

Texas Blogging Gals

Calling all Texas Bloggers.  Diana at To Everything A Season had this great idea to get all the women in Texas who blog together so we could all find each other.

It's easy, it's fast, it's fun, and so you should go,  K.  I'm running a little late on getting my post up about it.  For some reason I couldn't get the button to stay for the link up.  

So scoot on over there, grab their button and do what they tell you.  It'll be good and then lets see if we can really get more numbers in there.  

 

The Good, the I'll Deal With it and the Whew, that was Close!"

First, the praise.  My honey had a cat scan last week and we found out today that it shows a 70% reduction in the size of the lymph nodes.  Amen thank You Lord Jesus.  And thank you prayer warriors.

  

Second, I wasn't going to mention it on this blog but ........ I am anyway

It's foggy outside.  Seriously.  For like the third day in a row.  It is beautiful, but I would love to see some sunshine.  However, I have decided to praise God for my blessings and not to complain about things.  It's not that I want to complain, I think sometimes I fall into a habit of negative thinking.  Stinkin Thinkin.

I feel like God lead me to A Holy Experience blog, her writing is so beautiful that I just feel like I can hear God whisper right into my soul.  

(In)Courage had such a great message.  I love the way the writers take everyday experiences and dig into them and then relate those feelings into our spiritual walk with  Christ.  Brilliant and real. 

Then Layla at the Lettered Cottage blog wrote about a time in her life where her husband and her were struggling financially and how a random act of kindness, a pay it forward kind of thing, turned their life around.  Go read it, she is guest blogging at Lysa Terkeurst, which lead me to Lysa Terkeurst, 'nough said.

AND then, as if that wasn't enough and clearly it was, God gave me one more nugget, Beth Moore's new book came out today.  I had a wonderful conversation with my friend, Dawn another Texas Blogging Gal, about what she got out of the first chapter that is available online.  Am I the last person in the blog world, or the world for that matter, that didn't know about this before hand?  Go read it if you haven't already.  I am going to join the So Long Insecurity Discussion Group.  What about you?  Want to?  I'll meet you there.     

And thirdly, we were almost gassed!  For real.  Carbon monoxide.  Yesterday evening, I smelled gas and thought it was the guest bedroom bathroom because it's not used much.  So, I went in there and flushed the toilet and ran water in the sink and shower.  

While I was cooking dinner the carbon monoxide detector went off.  RS & I went in the attic and turned off the gas line to the HVAC and opened some doors and windows.  After a time the gas cleared out and the alarm stopped beeping.  This morning we discovered what had happened.  

See this, it is the intake, exhaust vent lines.  It takes exhaust from the heater out through the vent in the roof and the other line takes in fresh air.  The best we can figure is at some point melting ice and snow slid from the top of the roof and hit the vent thingy and broke the lines on the inside.  That was my  best technical jargon for the exhaust was venting into the attic and the intake was right beside it taking it back through the house. 

   
Come to think of it RS has had a constant headache for a couple of days now and I have had one too.  And I have been feeling pretty fatigued lately.

Donny and Augustine came over and put the temporary fix on it until it until the snow and ice melts completely and they can get on the roof and fix the whole thing.  Donny wrapped up every joint there was, just in case he said.  I love him.  He and his crew look after us and we need that.

  

This is a precautionary tale to remind you and anyone you know and love.  With our heaters working overtime check your carbon monoxide alarms, make sure they are working.  And if you smell anything gassy (other than your beloved)  check you units.  Make sure what happened to us isn't happening to you.

K, cause I love you, that's why.

  

And now, because I took them today, I'm showing you more pictures of the horses.  

I can't help myself.
I love them.

I want to leave you with the Word that Layla used so beautifully in her testimony today.  It spoke to me.

"Do not judge, and you will not be judged.  Do not condemn, and you will not be condemned.  Forgive, and you will be forgiven.  Give, and it will be given to you.  A good measure, pressed down, shaken together and running over, will be pored into your lap.  For with the measure you use, it will be measured to you."  Luke 6:37, 38

Blessings Beloved.